Sunday, 28 September 2008

Feeling Beautiful

To celebrate my coming of age next week me and my sister headed for a night out. We started of at a nice trendy bar with amazing marvelous cocktails. So as we moved on and then found ourselves queuing. And the line moved us more and more backwards. However in contrast to all other eager girls we stood quite uninterested, we had already had a blast of a night and our lives wouldn't end if we didn't get in.
Then the guy holding the guestlist catches my eye. And we exchange smiles. My dearest sister soon has to point out to the oblivious me that he is flirting with Sway Fatale.
This has never happened to me, certainly not in my hometown; After the next smile he exchanges some words with the bouncer and we are moved right past the line into the night club. Simply for looking good.
Self confidence boost? Oh yes.

And of course. He was sexy. We might have exchanged some kisses. I feel like 18 again. Vibrant. Free.

Friday, 26 September 2008

Sway Fatale endangers traffic

Joy Division thinks I am slightly mental. He loves it - I could have killed us but I must be good enough so he let me continue. Or, I know I am. 
Evidently, as he was driving I leaned over and gave him an intense blowjob... 

Monday, 15 September 2008

Hit me with your best shot

Miss Mortal has gone home, feels very empty here now. Who shall now play guitar hero with me and dance around to ABBA?

Fortunately Joy Division should be here by 1.. 

(Then I hope he leaves before 4 as my sister probably will arrive here then and I feel we are really not at the meet the parents level yet.)

Other than that the finance sector is on the verge of collapse and I seriously dread my future. But if all goes badly, at least I can smile and announce that I am quite good at guitar hero and make an excellent impression of a goldfish. 

Sunday, 14 September 2008

An unexpected liaison

"Is Joy Division your boyfriend?" Asks my my increasingly cool/annoying sister (aged 14). I ignore her and she asks another 411 times before I scream in panic and ask her to go away. But she has a point. We do spend time together most days, acting like a couple in public?!?!?! 

But its nice. Lets take it for what it is, he is struck down by an amazon who does even more stupid things than he does...

In general my life is a bit unexpected at the moment. Miss Mortal is over and we have both developed a passion for Guitar Hero. We are convinced that talent in this brilliant game will impress men = get us laid, once back at university (that's approximately 17 days..). Other than that we bake muffins, go for walks and drink tea. I also have a new love in my life, my Surf One longboard, that I think makes me look very cool. The closer I get to my 21st birthday the more of a 11-year-old I turn into.

(And then, a bit too often, we do go to bars/friends houses/restaurants and drink vodka. For some reason, usually in company with Joy Division and his disturbed friends.)

Pardon me. Now I shall go have breakfast with the parents

Monday, 8 September 2008

Catching up for lost time

So, The Ex called and asked if I'd slept with anyone else. So, when he then first asks me "not to tell him if I do", what do you think I should answer. Without blinking I told him I hadn't. 

Same night I fucked the Joy Division. 

Such a boy, slim hips, fumbling but enthusiastic, lovely. Good nostalgic feeling to have sex on a boat (the French-American and I lived on a yacht..). All day he stroked my arm and gave me little kisses. Very very cute. No strings attached but still good laughs and care. This could be good.

I sound like a horrible person, really, I have fallen so hard for Object, but he cannot be mine.And the Joy Divison is no stranger in the dark, he is a lovely boy with the flirtiest smile.I cannot sit around at my parents house feeling sorry for myself. So yes, went sailing with the boys and night ended in a not so unexpected way.

Lets see it like this; Black Widow tries to make the best out of beautiful scandinavian men before leaving for England where she shall live like a nun.  

Friday, 5 September 2008

Autumn approaches

I have always loved autumn. Its colours and heavy rains. The lack of public displayal of affection (I hate spring). Storms.

It has been a heavy week with working late and an obvious emptiness with Object not sitting next to me (He starts to work in a different department on monday and is now on some course learning to wear a tie).
Some days I have been a pathetic walking wreck of rejection.

Yet yesterday he came over. I touched his soft skin to impregnate the memory of his scultured body. Avoided crying as we said our final goodbyes, but I felt that he cared. And content that I did actaully get to see him one final time without the world watching.

Now I need to move on. I am on the right track. I think I have finished crying over men I don't really want. We shall see.

Monday, 1 September 2008

I hope they serve champagne in hell

I completely lack moral standards. I helped M hack her boyfriend's ex-girlfriend's email and Facebook account. With more brutal proof of what a egoistic liar he is (or has been, but that is irrelevant). 

We might go to hell but at least we stand by our actions. 

Moreover I'm on my second official date with midgettrader. As I am not into the whole Lord of the Rings thing I am now trying to find out something nice for a third date that will be very off-turning. Its fun but my sexual desires lies elsewhere...

Trivia: I have a bruise along my spine for having sex against a doorpost (in my living room/bedroom/closet, I am not an exhibitionist!). Its not as bad as the horisontal lines of copulating in a stairway..